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YourHub.com \\ Moorpark \\ Stories \\ Posting is no longer available. \\ General Tips & Techniques

How to Keep Your New Year’s Resolutions

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Contributed by: Wellspring Counseling Group on 1/4/2008

If you belong to a gym, you've undoubtedly noticed that it's overflowing with new members - people full of New Year's Resolution energy. But within the next few months, many of those gym members will have disappeared. People who made different New Year's Resolutions also will have let their plans fall by the wayside.

What can you do to keep your own New Year's Resolutions and, in general, increase your ability to follow through on self-improvement goals?

"I think a couple of key components in creating lasting change are to know yourself well and to build pleasure into the process," says Renée Haas, a licensed marriage and family therapist with offices in Moorpark and Westlake Village.

For example, a person wishing to lose weight and improve their health might join a gym even though they're not a "gym person" at heart.

"After a few weeks of doing cardiovascular exercise on a treadmill or elliptical machine, those people might be bored to pieces and throw in the towel on the concept of exercising altogether," Haas says.

"If they had done some self-exploration before joining the gym, they might have remembered how much they loved playing AYSO soccer as a kid. Or they might have noted how much they look forward to watching one of the dancing shows currently so popular on television. If that's the case, they might be better off joining an adult soccer league or signing up for salsa lessons through their local parks and recreation department. They'd be getting their exercise in a way that meets their personal criteria for fun."

Other elements of successful change are making realistic goals with short-term steps, and forgiving yourself when you stumble.

"Some goals seem so overwhelming that people essentially give up on ever achieving them," Haas says. "But small, incremental improvements can be very powerful over time."

If your marriage is foundering, rather than creating a large, unspecific objective such as "We need to communicate better," start with small, achievable positive statements, Haas suggests. These might include things such as, "During the coming week, I will make a sincere effort to stop interrupting my wife when she's speaking to me" or "By next weekend, I will plan a date night with my husband where we can talk in a quiet restaurant away from the kids."

"Achieving these goals and seeing the positive results can then feed your belief that larger, more global changes are possible if you keep working toward them," Haas says.

Compassion toward yourself can also go a long way. "If you're on a diet and find yourself face-down in Belgian chocolate one day, that doesn't have to mean your diet is a permanent failure," Haas notes. "Be kind to yourself, look at what triggered your slip, take a break if needed and then get back on track when you're ready."

Haas is a founding partner of Wellspring Counseling Group in Moorpark. You can reach her at (805) 306-1595.

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Wellspring Counseling Group

Moorpark , CA

Wellspring Counseling Group has posted 12 stories and 0 comments since joining on 4/10/2007. Wellspring Counseling Group 's average story rating is 4.

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