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Blog Entry 7 of 9 Annie's Mailbox - THE REAL ANSWERS

Don't you hate it when "experts" give people bad advice? When they cop out and say "Talk to a therapist"? Well, here is the straight-up, politically INcorrect advice that will save these poor people a trip to the therapist's office.

Blog Url: http://vc.yourhub.com/~RealAnswers

Friend Devastated About Being "Other Woman"

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Contributed by: Dame von Fiess on 4/22/2007

Best friend devastated about being "The Other Woman"
Annie's Mailbox, April 21, 2007

Dear Annie: My best friend, "Tiffany," is in an emotional rut. She is seeing a married man and is devastated by the fact that she is the Other Woman. She knew he was married when she started seeing him, but she didn't expect it to affect her as much as it does. She fell totally in love with this man, and he fell for her. The problem is, he hasn't told his wife he is unhappy and seeing another woman. He relies on his wife for financial assistance, while he relies on my best friend for love.

Tiffany's feelings are getting more out of control (she cries daily) because she doesn't have the man she loves. She can't stand the thought that he is sleeping with his wife. She keeps asking me for help and words of wisdom, and I have none to give her. She is so in love and yet so heartbroken. How can I help her through this despair? - Worried About Losing a Friend

ANNIE'S ANSWER

Dear Worried: As much as we feel sorry for Tiffany's anguish, we can't work up too much sympathy for a woman who deliberately involved herself with a married man. What was she thinking? These things rarely end well. He may be telling her the truth, but married men often say what their mistresses want to hear. It will take a lot of strength for Tiffany to remove herself from this situation, and she may not be willing. The most you can do for her is be a good listener and provide the tissues.

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THE ANSWER SHOULD HAVE BEEN:

Dear Worried: You can do so much more for your friend than simply listening and passing the tissues. Good grief! This woman needs intervention and you will be a treasured friend if you help her actively move past this disaster.

Many good books are available on this topic, either at the book store or the public library. (An example is , Are You the One for Me? by Barbara deAngelis.) Support groups are available online. Thousands of "other women" have lived to tell their tales and provide excellent advice on how to recover and become healthy.

Help your friend find these resources if she has trouble doing it herself. Collective "woman wisdom" will help her rebuild her self esteem. Eventually she will realize that a man who is disloyal to his wife and who uses other's women's affections is a creep who dosen't deserve her love. If she learns this lesson, she will never make the same mistake again.

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Submitted By: Gustavus Bernal

posted on 5/7/2007 @ 7:38:13 AM

(Not Rated)

Maybe he has a sexual addiction and she has taken advantage of the fact? Maybe your friend has created a situation that benefits her needs? I think you should sit with her and find out what her role was in this mess and see why she got involved in the first place? Maybe she is the cause?

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CONTRIBUTOR INFO

Dame von Fiess

Ventura , CA

Dame von Fiess has posted 9 blog entries and 1 comment since joining on 4/2/2007. Dame von Fiess's average blog rating is 3.92.

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